"Mr. Owl, How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"
"One...Two...Three...Crunch!!! Three."
How many licks DOES it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? The world may never know.
So there is this really nice girl in my ward. I've known her since September or so. Ever since we were first introduced she has been quite friendly to me. More so than I would have given her credit for based on my initial impression. I've felt like asking her out for a long time, but for various reasons I have not. Mostly I have felt like she is out of my league, on a number of levels. She has always been very friendly, but recently she has seemed more than just friendly. There has been some playful banter, and a little of what I percieve to be flirting. I like the thought of that.
However, it has been observed that she is a genuinely nice person. I am not saying the being genuinely nice is bad, on the contrary I find it to be an asset. But it does make me wonder about what I have been percieving. Am I projecting false intent on her actions, or is it really there? If I was staying in Provo, I could really put this to the test, but I am not. I am leaving in less than a week and will be gone for four months. I have alot to do before I leave. I wonder about trying to put this to the test before I go, but what good will it do me? If I find that I am imagining things, no harm done. But if I find that I am not, there is nothing to be done about it. I can't start a relationship and then leave, and expect that feelings are the same when I return. Neither do I think it wise to change my plans at this point based on the chance that something serious COULD develop. I NEED the money that I can make this summer in Denver. I do not want to jeopardize the chance to go back to school without having to work at the same time. Especially if it weren't to work out. As it stands, I've not been in a relationship that lasted more than 2 months.
And I still think she is out of my league. Not that she is 'high maintenance' in her attitude, but I think she is accustomed to a certain lifestyle. Also, I feel she has it together spiritually, more so than I do at the moment. Not that she is condecending, like I said she is genuinely friendly. But I feel inadequate. Yet I also hate the idea that she may be interested, but because I don't do anything about it now, her interest will wane. Frustration.
5 comments:
Hmmm...tough one.
Not quite sure who you're referring to, but I guess it doesn't really matter.
When I first met April, I wondered if she was interested or not. She was (and still is) a very friendly person, and, especially after she gave me a raincheck after the first date, I wondered if she was just being friendly. I was also way too attracted towards her to think that anything might work out :)
Guess what I'm trying to say is, it never hurts to try. Maybe you'll go on just one date, but then maybe you can write emails to each other all summer long.
Will you have regrets if you don't ask her out?
Sorry if an innocent observation threw you off your groove!
I probably would have second guessed myself there anyways, no worries.
So, being a girl, I feel inclined to let you in on a little secret- we are just as clueless as you. Or maybe it's just me. I am so scared at times to let word of my interest get out that I'm not very nice to said interest. I have no idea why, I think it has something to do with showing weakness. I have also been not so friendly to ward off any offers from people I think are nice but I have no interest in. On the other hand, some people are just so darn easy to be around you can't help being friendly, vibe or no vibe. I guess what I'm saying is she may or may not be interested, and you may just have to put yourself out there to find out. (as recent previous experience shows, I am not good at "putting myself out there" so I really shouldn't be offering such grand advice, but I am anyway)
I think you should do it. If anything, it will put your troubled mind at ease. And at the very least you will have an enjoyable evening with a nice person. First dates shouldn't have strings. How is that for a novel-like pep talk?
Well, I didn't end up on a date with this girl before I left. But there was a group of people having a barbecue right before I left, and I ended up hanging out with just her for awhile afterwards. You are right Caron, it did put my troubled mind at ease. But I didn't come out of it any more sure of her interest level. We did have an interesting conversation about how best to tell someone we weren't interested back. I would have liked to hear her thoughts on how she let someone she liked know that she WAS interested, but, c'est la vie.
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